Truth in Memoirs

Truth in memoirs is topic that over time has become more and more talked about in our society. In the past 10 years we have heard of plenty of literary scandals that have unfolded, such as James Frey’s, “A Million Little Pieces” or Norma Khouri’s, “Forbidden Love;” but why is there such a rise in being untruthful and what can be done to stop this? Fern Kupfer, an English professor at Iowa State University wrote an essay called, Everything But The Truth,where she explains how there are three kind of “lies” that are not only acceptable, but also necessary in memoir writing.

She begins by explaining how although many of us would like to read good stories, we also don’t like to be lied too. Kupfer then goes on to tell a story about a student she once had in her nonfiction seminar class, Chris, who told an elaborate tale of his family, where his father deserted them and his mother was left alone with his siblings to survive. Chris eventually got an A in that class, and the following year Kupfer happened to have his girlfriend as a student. Through talking with her and hearing how she was going to visit Chris’ parent’s for the holidays, Kupfer became confused, because from Chris’ story, that didn’t seem to add up. As she began to dig deeper, she realized Chris’ has lied to her in his memoir, and his parents never separated to begin with. Kupfer felt betrayed, and seeing how you can accessorize the truth to make your story seem less dull, Chris in fact “did more than our creative judgments could have allowed…Chris had constructed exclusively from his imagination. Chris had lied” (292). Kupfer then moves on to explain how she get questions from her students all the time about how they feel they can’t mold their stories in a way they feel in which they aren’t lying. She then tell us how there are three kinds of lies that are acceptable, and how we “need to give memoir writers permission to lie, but only when the reconstructed version of the story doesn’t deceive the reader” (292).The first lie that is deemed acceptable is little “white lies” that you make up when you are unable to remember the minor details, such as the color of your coat, the dress you wore on your birthday, and so on. The second lie is one that “narrative structure often demands: composite characterization, compression of time, omission of unnecessary detail” (293). Where some details could take up too much time, or clog or overpopulate your story, it is better to compress characters or take out information that allow you to get straight to the point. The last lie is that called “the gift of perhaps.” She describes how you can imagine the “what if’s” of your story, to help you better understand characters feelings, thoughts, desires, etc. Your story is to be told from your perspective, and so shaping the truth without having the reconstructed version deceive the reader is an acceptable aspect of this type of writing.

With that being said, do you agree with her methods of acceptable lies? Do you think they are necessary when formulating your memoir? Is okay to use your imagination in writing and how much? How does one formulate boundaries when writing memoirs? Should any type of “lying” or shaping the truth be acceptable?